For almost exactly 56 hours, I battled the devil in the form of some sort of intestinal flu. In the end, the devil was defeated. I would like to give a shout-out to the various products that helped me put the evil one to rest, but that would have required for at least one of them to have actually worked.
The least effective and most troubling was Pepto-Bismol. Not only did it do nothing to stop the various symptoms, but did something to the evil poring out of my body that was neither natural or normal.
If you find yourself facing down the devil in the form of an intestinal flu, remember that Pepto not only has the most annoying jiggle on the planet but absolutely no power against satan himself. The best advice I can give is drink Gatoraid to keep your electrolytes up (read that somewhere once), use extra soft tissue paper and repent for all your sins.
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